Meditation vs

I tried many times meditating as instructed, mindfulness techniques, and other type of affirmation techniques. They didn’t work fast enough for me, and that is why I gave up many times. I simply didn’t have enough patience for it. Because I am living a busy entrepreneurial life.

For most of my life I also had problems with sleep, I couldn’t fall asleep, I would be watching TV or movies until I would pass out, and it made it hard for me to wake up the next morning. I couldn’t sleep, because my mind would wander from one worry to another, about today, about yesterday, about tomorrow and so on. The only certain way for me to fall asleep was after consuming alcohol. I would get drunk, and simply pass out. I did get hangovers, but at least I would get a proper sleep. This lasted more than half of my life, growing up in Denmark, drinking was legal from the age of 15. In 2014 I gave it up. And my body had a hard time adjusting, because now I didn’t have a way to get a deep sleep at all. Being sober in my busy life, is harder than I could imagine. By 2016 I was a total burnout. I refused to give up, and I was seeking something that would work, as I was determined to become healthy. Apart from not being able to sleep, I suffered from physical joint pain and inflammation. The doctors gave me a very tragic diagnosis, which I later found to be false. Determination to become healthy once and for all, by natural means, was what started to move my life’s circumstances for me, and eventually guiding me to discover books and tools which brought me here today. I was reading “Intuition – your secret power” at the end of 2015 and later on I stumbled upon Ivan Rados’ magical yantra cards. Actually they did the first trick for me, I was focusing on one card, whilst laying in my bathtub, exhausted after a very difficult business trip. I was repeating a sentence which was on the card, and I just kept going, repeating it and repeating it for 20 mins or so, not letting any other thoughts interfere, while I was gazing at the card. I was experimenting, nobody told me to do it in this way.
Then all I recall was waking up in the tub, I must have passed out, I don’t know how long time has passed. Maybe a few mins, maybe more. But what happened was extraordinary for me, the sentence that I was repeating over and over again, was now repeating it self in my mind. When I became conscious, it felt as if I had a new body. My backpain was gone, and I had so much energy.

That night, I went to bed at around 9 pm, without watching any movies nor reading any books, I simply went to bed, and passed out. For 3 weeks, I have been in wonderland. I was sleeping before my wife, which was totally unusual for me and waking up early. That sentence kept going in my head all this time, day and night. I would wake up, and the sentence was on. During the day, I would repeat it with my first voice as well, if it got quiet. I went on 3 different airplane flights in one week, where before, I used to be afraid of flying. A true miracle happened. I am so grateful to you Ivan, for producing those cards.

This new state lasted for a bout 3 weeks, and while it worked perfectly for me, when I was being alone, it didn’t work for business meetings, because I had to be thinking and communicating. The repetition of the sentence was waning off, I was getting my old me back, with fears and worries, and physical pain was crawling back. The biggest worry, was that I was about to loose this new healthy and fearless state, which I have acquired. I didn’t want to go back to the pain I have had all these years.
I was in the middle of a crisis at work, I was trying with all my might, to save a start-up from crashing. And I was also in a crisis at home, my relationship with my wife was at its worse, it was deteriorating, as my body and mind was.

All suffering, eventually pays off, unless it kills us. In my case, this was a huge step in my realisation, that I didn’t have any arthritis, as the doctors told me. Yes I did have inflammation, but then how come, I was totally healthy for 3 weeks, without any medicine? I gave up the medicine at the end of 2015, which was hurting my digestion system. The side effects were terrible. That was when I got a hold of another book, also by Ivan Rados “Health – is all about consciousness”. I can highly recommend this book. I understood, that it was myself who was producing the illness. In there, was a lotus meditation described by Ivan. It was the foundation for The lotus didn’t work for me, it was simply impossible for me to imagine a flower, whilst having 50 emails a day, and trying to save a company from bankruptcy. The syllables which are used in the lotus meditation, are used in many other Buddhist and Hindu meditation techniques, because the syllables are related to the chakra points. All the chakra talk ( no offence ), didn’t work for me either, because I need to see things and feel things in order to believe it. I am a non believer as one CEO told me once, when I tried to tell her about recently.

For some of us, like me, in order to believe, we need to experience something first hand. I did experience a new body after hypnotising myself with geometry and repetition. That worked, then I was trying to do the lotus, it didn’t work, but what worked was my own experiments. Instead of the lotus, which I couldn’t imagine, I focused on the digits, which I could imagine, and all I did was persistence. I forced myself to breathe the 49 breaths each day around noon. Each month, I would discover something useful and added it to the basic ingrediencies. After nine months of daily practice, I had no clue what I have been doing, it turned out, that I have been able to focus my attention on several things at the same time, during my breathing sessions, each and every session, made me feel soo good, and relaxed me.
Focusing on several things at the same time let’s you stop your internal dialogue. Someone told me that by coincidence. I will write more about it, as I didn’t have a clue what was the internal dialogue.
As Ivan wrote in his book, meditation, is not a doing, meditation is a state of being, and I totally agree with him. Today, I have been breathing daily for over 3 years, and today, I am in this meditative state, during most of my day, but I am busier than ever, creating a new start-up and at the same time, I was able to bring to life. I have built two products at the same time. I have managed to turn around my relationship at home, and I am doing better than ever in terms of physical and mental health. I can’t thank Ivan enough, thank you again and again, I wish to meet you one day.
That is why is not a meditation, it is really a breathing technique for hard core realists, non-believers and professionals like me. And it is A DOING, oh yes, but for us, it is not a problem, because DOING is all we do and know. Until we learn NOT DOING. I will write more about that too. NOT-DOING will rip your mind apart 🙂

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